Uno with Erin

Ever played the card game Uno? The object of the game is to be the first player to get rid of all your cards. Erin got a Sesame Street version as a gift not so long ago, and has recently really taken to the game. There aren't many things that provide her with as much joy in life as slapping down one of those cards that require Laur or I to draw 2, lose a turn, or best of all, draw 4 cards. It's really funny to see how much pleasure she gets out of forcing one of us to lose a turn or pick up more cards. She shows her pleasure through a full range of emotion, from the basic little sly grin, all the way to the gloating, taunting , hysterical laughter. Consider yourselves forewarned... she is a shark when it comes to Uno.

Here is the "Everywhere I Go" song

If you've never heard it, here is a link to the Moose and Zee "Everywhere I Go" song referenced in a previous post. Erin and I both love this song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=abUhT2zeCKU&feature=related

Panic and "Everywhere I Go"

Anyone who has been to our house knows that it is not large. We have a little living room, a tiny dining room, a kitchen that is so small that the refrigerator is actually not in the kitchen but in the hallway, two little bathrooms, and three tiny bedrooms. When we were moving in, we quickly discovered that we had more furniture than space, and as a result, much of our furniture wound up in the basement. So did the computer. Which brings me to my latest Erin story.

Today, I decided to take a vacation day, relax, and stay home with Erin. After Laureen left for work, Erin and I played with some of her toys in her room, and then we played a couple of games of Guess Who. After the second game of Guess Who, my joints had taken all they could of sitting on the hardwood floor, and since Erin told me she was hungry, I figured it was a good time for me to take a break. I turned the TV on and changed the channel to the Noggin network, which consistently shows most of Erin's favorite shows (Toot & Puddle, Oswald, Jack's Big Music Show, Miss Spider, Little Bill, Pinky Dinky Doo, etc). Then I went and got Erin a banana.

With Erin situated and her hunger temporarily satiated, I figured that this was a good time for me to retire to the basement to check my email. Oswald was on, which tends to be her absolute favorite (though there is some wiggle room in the standings... I guess it depends on her mood when you ask her), so I figured I had at least 30 minutes of freedom. I dashed down the stairs and logged into my hotmail account. And I had mail... lots of it (a pretty rare occasion for me). I had about 12 actual messages in addition to a multitude of forwards... hmmm... "maybe 30 minutes won't be enough time," I remember thinking to myself.

I think I was about halfway through the second message, which was related to Relay, when a chill went down my spine as I heard a loud thump in the living room and Erin let out this blood curtling scream from upstairs, "DADOO!!!! DADOO!!!!!! YOU HAVE TO COME UP HERE NOW!!!!"

Any parent reading this can relate... I think my heart stopped beating, terrible thoughts racing through my head for a second (how could I have left her alone... what kind of a father am I, etc), as I leapt from the chair, sending the keyboard and mouse clattering to the floor, and raced up the stairs two at a time, through the kitchen door and dining room, finally bursting into the living room not knowing what to expect. I know I certainly didn't expect what received me as I scanned the room.

There, in the middle of our little living room, enthusiastically danced a grinning Erin, her little chair overturned on the floor (evidently the source of the thud that I had heard). On the TV was the Moose and Zee song "Everywhere I Go", which Erin knows I love.

"Dadoo, I had to call you because your favorite song is on... LET'S DANCE!" she exclaimed joyfully. I snatched her up in a hug, laughing hysterically as relief swept over my body (and Moose sang "puppies are the cutiest, treasure is the lootiest, teams are the rootiest, horns are the tootiest... everywhere I go). Putting her down, we danced, clapped, and laughed our way through that song... that silly, stupid song. When it was over, I decided to forgo finishing up with my email. It could wait... this was one of those perspective clarifying moments. Erin and I built her Princess puzzle instead (3 times).

It's like one of those credit card commercials. You know, where they detail the cost of certain items (like checking your email, thinking something awful had happened to your daughter, etc), but finish up with something along the lines of spending some quality time with your little girl: priceless.

Kids Should Be Allowed To Be Kids

Just finished watching a segment on HBO's Real Sports program about parents pushing their children to get involved with sports at younger and younger ages. There was this one father who was shown coaching his 6-year old son at a wrestling tournament... yelling at him from the side of the mat and giving him instruction prior to a match... he reminded me of the evil sensei in Karate Kid... you know, the whole "mercy is for the weak" type of a guy. I would not have much of a problem with this, except that his kid was 6 years old. Get a grip, buddy! Brings to mind those disturbing Pageant Parents who get some kind of vicarious thrill by parading their pre-pubescent children around on a stage dolled up like miniature adults.

The segment then proceeded to inform the viewers that some parents are looking for a competitive edge for their children even earlier than six... cue the footage of parents swabbing their children's mouths for DNA samples so that a lab can analyze them and produce a report detailing which sports the children might excel at. Ughhh!!!!! This news has an amost Orwellian tinge to it. Suffice it to say, I got chills. What is the next logical step for these people? Maybe genetically engineering their children to be predisposed towards a particular activity?

Come on now, people. What about the value of kids just being kids? Missing from this doumentary and other similar ones is any sign of joy from the children participating. It is pretty clear to me (and, I believe, to any fair-minded viewer) that these children are only involved because they want to please their parents. Invariably, when the cameras show close-ups of these kids, there is nary a smile to be found. In our society, in this day and age, kids grow up fast... in many ways faster than ever before. Why would we do anything to accelerate the process? Many adults spend large portions of their lives trying to recapture the essence of their childhood, but at the same time, these same adults try to rush their children through those very years. I don't see the logic in it.

Sure, there is a value to organized activites, but a five year old does not need to be involved in 4 different activities, does not need to be coached as if competing for a championship. This is a time to teach critical game fundamentals (rules of the game, sportsmanship, teamwork). Let the child decide if he or she wants to play a sport. And let's remember who is the parent as well. If a kid wants to participate in too many activities, set some boundaries. Again, they are children, and in most cases do not necessarily know what is best for them.

Young kids need free play as much as they need organized activities (if not more), and it is critical that we as parents strike a balance for them. Free play helps develop their imagination, teaches them about social interaction, and is just plain fun. They are children... not everything they do has to serve some grander purpose. Besides, fun is possibly the most critical part of childhood. That is why there is a distinction between childhood and adulthood. The most important job that a child has is to have fun. As parents, some of us need to learn to get out of the way and let them do so.

The USS Block Island Story

This was my Grandpa's ship during WWII. It was torpedoed and sank. The survivors were picked up and taken to Casablanca. Grandpa almost never recounted this story to us, but I'll never forget the night he got to talking about it... how his eyes welled up and he fought to hold back the emotion...

Laur is old?

Today, Erin and Laureen were in Lyndhurst for Laur's dental appointment with Dr. Wong. They enjoyed a nice day together. Erin was comfortable enough at Dr. Wong's to actually sit in the chair while the hygienest moved it up and down and reclined it. This was quite a novelty to Erin, a chair that is also like a ride! After Dr. Wong's, they had lunch together and hit up the Lyndhurst Pastry Shop for some of their famous chocolate Italian Ice. Then Laur took Erin around town to show her some landmarks from Laur's childhood. Erin's reaction to the house Laureen grew up in was a prolonged giggle followed by, "That's small!!" Then, as Laureen pointed out her old elementary school, Sacred Heart, Erin exclaimed "Wow!! That must be old!!" Makes you wonder just how old Erin thinks Mommy is.

The Spectre of Big Government

Wouldn't it be nice to live in a nation where the government provides you with your every want... a place where all your needs are met by the benevolent bureaucrats who oversee every aspect of your life... a place where risk is eliminated through the almighty power of the state? Here's the problem, such a place cannot exist. The government cannot provide anything to you without first taking from someone else. The U.S. government produces no wealth, save for that which it confiscates from the great people of our nation in the form of taxes, tariffs, and fees.


There is nothing that government does better or more efficiently than private enterprise does. Government agencies, without exception that I have ever witnessed, are replete with all kinds of nauseating waste. The bureaucrats in our Federal Government have driven both Social Security and Medicare to the brink of insolvency, with bankruptcy a virtual certainty if no action is taken to correct the issue. Imagine if businesses were run like the federal government. Would you invest in a business that routinely spends considerably more money than it takes in? My suspicion is that you would not (at least not if you expected any kind of return on your investment). Nobody wants to invest money in a failed or failing venture. So why do we keep pouring money into the rathole that is the government?


A perfect example is government spending on education. We have been throwing more and more money at education for decades, with no real measurable improvement. Our education system is broken, especially in urban schools all over the country. And our attempt to fix the problem is to increase education funding, infinitely. But money alone cannot fix the problem. Not without the right policy solutions. I don't know what the answers are, but it would seem to me that building accoutnability back into the system would be an effective start.

If insanity is defined as repeating the same behavior and expecting different results, than what does it say about us that, in pursuit of higher quality education, not only are we repeating the same behavior, we are spending more to do so?

And since government can't even change a light bulb without commissioning an expensive, taxpayer-funded study about the best way to approach the task, than what business do they have telling me what type of light bulb I have to use in my own home? Or how many mile per gallon of gasoline my car must average? Or whether or not I can own a firearm? All of these little rules and regulations for "the greater good" amount to erosions of our freedom.

These people in Congress work for us. They need to be reminded of this fact (many of us need to be reminded of this fact as well). And it needs to be a blunt, unequivocal wake-up call. Stop voting for incumbents in any party who fail to take a hard-line stance on wasteful government spending and tax increases. If our taxes and the federal budget don't decrease during their term in office, vote them out of office. If our so-called leaders won't draw a line in the sand on federal spending, than let's draw it for them, with our votes. Sooner or later, they will get the message. They were not born into their positions by divine right... they serve in D.C. by the Grace and at the Will of the American People. They can either become part of the solution or they can get the hell out!

Alyssa Douglas

Today, I went to meet several other Relay for Life Committee members and a West Orange Schools Employee at the site for a preliminary, pre-event walkthrough. While there, by chance, we bumped into a young lady who is a student at West Orange High School and also very involved with the committee. She informed us of some sad news that none of us had yet heard. Alyssa Douglas, who was a vibrant and energetic young lady, lost her fight with Leukemia this past Saturday at the age of 18. In my very brief exposure to her, it was clear that she was an exceptional person, and she will be missed. Today was a sad day, but in a way, it gives a renewed purpose to this year's Relay. As Deirdre said as we walked to our cars, "this is why we do it... ". Please keep Alyssa and the Douglas family in your prayers.

Taxation and Traffic Tickets

Everyday, the New York Post newspaper publishes a "Weird But True" column. In today's issue, there is a blurb about a police officer in Boston who was suspended for going on a ticket writing spree near the statehouse while the lawmakers were cutting police salaries.

I wonder if the tickets were legitimate or fraudulent. If they were legit, than what difference does it make what the officer's motivation was in writing them? A violation is a violation, right? I suspect that if the officer had written all his tickets in some blue-collar neighborhood instead of at the statehouse, than these Pols would have been gleeful about the amount of revenue he was generating for the City, not punishing him for it.

It brings to mind the hypocrisy of all the tax cheats that reside within our federal government, either as elected officials or appointed bureaucrats. It often seems that the very people that are screaming the loudest about paying higher taxes being a patriotic duty are the same lowlife crooks who get caught scamming the system (you know, the Charlie Rangels, Tom Daschles, and Timothy Geithners of the world, and their ilk). When caught, the excuse always seems to be "Oh, I (or better yet, my accountant) made a mistake. I didn't realize I had to report this as income," or some variation of this story.

Suppose you are feeling charitable and actually want to grant these people the benefit of the doubt (personally, I am not so inclined because I believe that if it were you or I caught for cheating on taxes and our excuse was "I didn't know", there wouldn't be much sympathy headed our way from the good ol' IRS). Aren't they, the very proponents of the status quo, in their actions as tax cheats making the best argument possible for reforming our assinine tax code? I mean, if our tax code really is so complex that the fools writing and administering the legislation governing it cannot be expected to comply with it, than isn't it time we scrap it and start over with something new?

Several friends of mine have become fans of the national consumption or "sales tax" that Mike Huckabee brought to some mainstream prominence during the Republican Presidential Primaries in 2008. I see several problems with a consumption tax, however, not the least of which is the idea that by taxing everything we buy on a national basis at the level necessary to replace the income tax (I've seen estimates from 20-30%), we will effectively discourage people from making purchases, which in turn will hurt the economy and at the same time deprive the federal government of tax revenue. My fear is that this loss of revenue will force Washington to either cut spending or find new ways to tax us. And we all know how likely it is that the politicians in D.C. will cut spending... let's just say, don't bank on it.

No, I am more a fan of a flat tax, similar to what Hong Kong & many of the former Soviet Republics have adopted (including Russia). I feel it is the way to go. With a lower, flat rate, and no double taxation, the people keep more of their hard-earned money, & government revenues increase because tax paying compliance improves (fewer cheats). Plus, the code is simple... needing no more than 2 post-card sized pieces of paper to define. That makes a lot more sense to me than our current 16,845 page (and ever-growing) disaster of a tax code.

I don't know if people realize that until 1913 and the passage of the 16th ammendment to the US Constitution, we did not have a permanent income tax in the USA. So prior to 1913, government found ways to fund itself without taxing the citizens. Now I realize that prior to 1913, we didn't have boatloads of New Deal and Great Society social programs to pay for, nor did we have a national interstate system to support, or countless other Federal endeavors and programs... I am not so naive as to believe that we can do away with taxes altogether. I just feel that if they were simplified and implemented more fairly, it would go a long way to improving the quality of life for us all.

More on Riding With Erin

While driving, Erin and I often play the "Questions" game. It's really not much of a game... I just fire off a series of random, unrelated questions and Erin answers them, to the best of her knowledge & ability.

In our most recent round of the game, I eventually asked Erin "Who is the grumpiest person you know?" Understand that this was really a loaded question, for I fully expected the answer to come back, "You are, Dadoo" (Erin had told my Mom last week that I yell at her all the time). So again, I am expecting her to tell me that I am the grumpiest.

Sure enough, Erin smiles her wicked little smile and says, "I think Dadoo is the grumpiest."

For the record, I don't consider myself to be all that grumpy. I mean, Erin and I spend a good deal of our time together laughing hysterically. So I feel the need to pry for more information. Trying to sound non-committal, I follow up with:

"Why do you think I'm the grumpiest?"
"Well, when you say bad things to me," Erin replies, after thinking about her answer for a few seconds.
"Hmm... can you give me an example of a bad thing that I say?"
"Dadoo, what's a zample?"
Jeez... how do you explain the word "example" to a 3.5 year old? I stop and think about it for a few moments. Then I try again.
"Can you tell me about one of the bad things that I say to you that makes you think I'm grumpiest?"

Silence... prolonged silence.

I sneak a glance in the rear-view mirror. Erin looks deep in thought.
"Erin?"
"Yes Dadoo?"
"Can you tell me one of the bad things I say?"
"Drive Dadoo. Just - drive."
Conversation over... game over. Who knew that at 3.5 years old, Erin had already mastered the art of female conversation.

Civil Society?

Where has civility gone? I recently had a customer who was so outrageously rude and blatantly obnoxious, it rendered her partially valid complaint completely irrelevent. I understand that dealing with unhappy, possibly irate customers goes with the territory for me in my position, but some people just cross the line, and for no good reason. I don't even have a problem with people getting angry and excited... in fact, I usually excel at defusing such situations (I live the axiom that the customer is always right). Sticks and stones and all that jazz, but on the other hand, words have weight and meaning, and I will not put up with profanity and name-calling (especially when it is directed at my employees), not for any reason. I banned this particular customer from my store, a truly rare occurence for me (it's been several years since I have taken this dramatic step with a customer). It is this kind of interaction that almost seems like a microcosm of politics in America today... don't like what you're hearing, well ratchet the rhetoric right up to shrill banshee-level. It's enough to make you wish for a Mute button for real life.

Say What?

This is word-for-word, a direct transcription of a conversation that I just had with Erin in the car:

"Dadoo, I got the wrapper off my stickers."

"Oh, that's good."

"No Dadoo, I got the wrapper off my stickers."

"O.K. That's fine sweetie. Just hold on to them for now."

"But Daaaaadoooo... I got the wrapper off my STICKERS!"

"I understand, Erin, but I'm driving right now, so I'm not sure what you want me to do about it."

After a sigh from Erin and a short pause:

"Dadoo, you never say 'oh, I forgot.'"

"What's that, Erin?"

"YOU NEVER SAY 'OH, I FORGOT.'"

"Well, should I say 'Oh, I forgot?'"

"Yes."

"O.K. Oh, I forgot."

"NOOOOOOOO!!!!!! You have to say it after I say something funny."

"Ummm... O.K. Like when?"

"Like when I say 'Dadoo, I got the wrapper off my stickers.'"

OHHHHHHHHHHHHH... now it makes perfect sense.

Weekend Wedding

Laureen and I went to a wedding this past weekend. Two dear friends were married (one long-time friend & one relatively new friend). It was a truly joyous occassion. There was a great deal of dancing & laughing, with some joyful tears mixed in. The groom and I go back a long way... and his friendship means a lot to me... he can get away with telling me things that very few others can... in fact, this honesty is really at the core of our friendship. The bride is a wonderful, caring person who has really endeared herself to Laureen and I, and I envision a lifelong friendship. We are so happy for them both as they start their lives anew as a married couple, and wish for them a lifetime of happiness and eternal love.

Politics- An American's Creed

I am so sick of disingenuous career politicians who are motivated solely by their transparent personal ambitions. Just once, I would like to see a man or woman of real substance come before the people with a real set of core beliefs, and not be afraid to espouse and articulate those beliefs. In the Catholic Church, we have an Apostle's Creed. Call this an American's Creed. In my wildest fantasies, it would go something like this (picture a candidate standing before a packed house of potential supporters):

Good evening, Ladies and Gentlemen,

I come before you today to offer you a synopsis of my core beliefs and values... beliefs and values that will shape how I represent you should you choose to vote for me.

I believe in the Greatness of this nation, my nation, the United States of America. The United States has been the greatest force for good that this world has ever known. Millions of people the world over have cast off the shackles of tyranny as a result of the efforts of, and at great cost to, the men and women of our military. I am unashamed of and unapologetic for the history of my nation.

I believe in the sanctity of our governing document, the Constitution of The United States of America. Never in the history of man, before or since, has there been a document that so succinctly and eloquently lays out the confines and limits of the power of a government to reach into the lives of a nation's free citizens. I believe the Constitution should be interpreted as it was written, respected and defended as the supreme law of our land. As Abraham Lincoln stated, we have a "government of the people, by the people, and for the people."

I believe that the more we ask our government to do for us, the more intrusive it becomes, and as a consequence, the less free we all become. Scaling back our government is the only way to ensure the freedom that so many amongst us now often take for granted.

I believe in the Greatness of our Founding Fathers. These wise men had the visionary foresight to build into the Constitution a process that affords We, the People to right the wrongs of our past as they become clear to us, through the passage of Constitutional Ammendments. These men are the drafters of our Declaration of Independence, our Constitution, & our Bill of Rights, and for these facts alone, they should be historically revered, not disparaged for their faults.

I believe that Constitutional Ammendments are the one and only way that changes should be made to our Constitution, as was intended by the Framers. I also believe that Federal Judges should be held to their oathes to uphold the U.S. Constitution, and if they fail in their duty, they should be impeached by Congress.

I believe in the inherent goodness of the American People. We are without question the most altruistic, generous people on the whole of the planet, and I am tired of being treated like we don't do enough for the rest of the world by the hand-wringing do-nothings that inhabit that Cesspool in Turtle Bay otherwise known as the United Nations.

I believe in the power of American-style capitalism, when coupled with a free democratic government, to improve the quality of life for all people. I believe that it is time that we in the United States jump-start our economic engines by abolishing our absurdly complex tax code and replace it with something that takes no more than one page to explain. No loopholes, no tax breaks, Everyone pays. I am tired of bearing more than my share of the tax burden while nearly 50% of the population pays nothing. Our goal should always be to lift the unfortunate up... raise their standing in life... not to drag the fortunate back down. Achievers should never be punished for achieving, for if they are, then what is the incentive to achieve anything?


I believe in the importance of property rights in securing a people's freedom. When government can strip a man of his property on a whim, then how can said man ever be truly free? I also believe in the binding legality of contracts. Protection of said contracts is vital to the preservation of our free-market system of commerce.


I believe in the sanctity of innocent life. "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness." Funny how "Choice" didn't make the cut as an unalienable right in our Declaration of Independence.

I believe in personal accountability and taking responsibility for our mistakes. We are all fallible and we all screw up from time to time, but it is how we handle our mistakes that helps to shape who we are.

Finally, I believe strongly that, as Ronald Reagan said in his first Inaugural Address, "We are a nation that has a government- not the other way around. And this makes us special among the nations of the Earth. Our government has no power except that granted it by the people." It is time that the so-called public servants in Washington D.C. wake up and remember just who it is that they serve.

Thank you for your time. God Bless America!